I knew exactly how to help her succeed. But the situation made it impossible.

I knew exactly how to help her succeed. But the situation made it impossible.

I was leading a team when we hired "Jane" - an ambitious, experienced director I'd championed through the hiring process. I could see her strengths, her potential, and I was genuinely excited to support her growth.

But there was a problem: timing.

I was being promoted, which meant Jane would start reporting to my boss (an SVP), then switch to reporting to me (a VP) just weeks later.

I tried everything to prevent this scenario. It was a terrible plan, and I knew it.
Jane felt blindsided. From her perspective, she'd been demoted before she even got started.

The complex piece:

I had the skills and desire to mentor her. My boss - the SVP she wanted to report to - had neither the bandwidth nor interest in developing her. (We've all had bosses like this, right? 🤦🏼‍♀️)

If Jane wanted to grow fast, working with me was objectively her best path forward.

But she didn't see it that way.

So in our 1:1s, she'd ask about advancement and growth. But it was clear she didn't value my feedback. She was going through the motions.

Here's what broke my heart:

Jane had so much potential. I genuinely wanted to help her grow - and I knew how.

But because of how the situation unfolded, she couldn't accept that help. She was stuck in the story that this was a demotion, which meant my guidance felt like something to resist rather than leverage.

So I watched her grow slowly.
Struggle unnecessarily.
Learn things the hard way.

Not because she lacked talent or I lacked ability to help. But because the complex dynamics between us made it impossible for either of us to work the way we wanted.

➡️ What would you have done?

(And if you've been here - where you knew the path forward but the dynamics made it impossible - I'd love to hear your story.)